Unusual Sayings 

"He was a wise man who invented beer." - Plato

"Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon." - Susan Ertz

"I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land." - Jon Stewart

"No one wants advice- only corroboration." - John Steinbeck

"I was brought up to respect my elders... and now I don't have to respect anybody. - George Burns

"Each generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it." - George Orwell

"The years between 50 and 70 are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and you are not yet decrepit enought to turn them down." - T.S. Elliot

"Anything too stupid to be said is sung" - Voltaire

"I believe the government that governs best is the government that governs least. And by these standards, we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq." - Stephen Colbert

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.

He who will not economize will have to agonize.

Respect yourself and others will respect you.

Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in getting up every time we do.

When anger rises, think of the consequences. Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart.

He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good. Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

The scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.

To go beyond is as wrong as to fall short. - Confucius

"When you say that you agree to a thing in principle you mean that you have not the slightest intention of carrying it out in practice." - Otto von Bismarck

"Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong." - Oscar Wilde

"Ah, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp, Or what's heaven for?" - Robert Browning

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. - Mark Twain

"Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few."  Gaby Kaplan, letter to Salon.com-

"Love your enemies just in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of bastards."George Bernard Shaw

"There is nothing wrong with America that cannot be cured by what is right with America." - Bill Clinton

"America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail it knocks over a chair." - Arold Toynbee

"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight." - Phyllis Diller

"Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art." - Tom Stoppard

The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.

The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.

Silence is the most perfect expression of scorn. Georege Bernard Shaw

"Everybody has to believe in something...I believe I'll have another drink" - W.C. Fields

"The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass." - Martin Mull

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." - Henny Youngman

When asked if he knew drinking led to a slow death,
Robert Benchley replied: "So who's in a hurry?"

A tavern chair is the throne of human felicity." - Samuel Johnson

"Alcohol is like love: the first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you just take the girl's clothes off." - Raymond Chandler

While accepting an award "I don't deserve this, but I have arthritis, and I don't deserve that either." - Jack Benny

"It is with narrow-souled people as with narrow-necked bottles: the less they have in them, the more noise they make in pouring it out." - Alexander Pope

"To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it." - Mother Teresa "If you see anybody fallen by the wayside and lying in the ditch, it isn't much good climbing into the ditch and lying by his side." - H.R.L. Sheppard

"I am not only a pacifist but a militant pacifist. I am willing to fight for peace. Nothing will end war unless the people themselves refuse to go to war." -Albert Einstein

"If I had all the money I've spent on drink, I'd go out and spend it on drink." - Vivian Stanshall "

"Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them." - James Baldwin

More unusual signs for your amusement

   
 Well, that's telling them             And don't drink and spell.


   
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