Unusual Sayings...
"An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile - hoping that it will eat him last." - Winston Churchill
"You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist." - Indira Gandhi
"Egotist, n. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me." - Ambrose Bierce
"From the moment I picked up your book until I layed it down, I was convusled with laughter. Someday I intend reading it." - Groucho Marx
"You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time; but you can't fool all of the people all of the time." - Abraham Lincoln
"You can fool too many people too much of the time." - James Thurber
"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up." - Tom Lehrer
"It is hard to tell if a man is telling the truth when you know you would lie if you were in his place." - H. L. Mencken
There is no fire like passion, there is no shark like hatred, there is no snare like folly, there is no torrent like greed." - Buddha
"I have never advocated war except as a means of peace." - Ulysses S. Grant
"We are going to have peace even if we have to fight for it." - Dwight D. Eisenhower
"A man is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits." - Richard Nixon
"If you're not big enough to lose, you're not big enough to win." - Walter Reutner
"Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than the wisest man can answer." - Charles Caleb Colton
"He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps perpetrate it." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
From the world's greatest philosopher, Groucho Marx:
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. A man's only as old as the woman he feels.
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.
Women should be obscene and not heard.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?
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The following is the winning entry in an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term:
This year's term was "Political Correctness."
The winner wrote:
"Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."
More unusual signs to make you laugh
 
"Open Range" sign seen in Go back to your behind?
Wyoming
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